I have entered the world of blogging! My purpose? To stay connected to friends and family and invite you into my world. A world filled with fun, tears, laughter, excitement, elation, disappointment and all the blessings of being a mother and wife.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

I wanted to share...

One of my first posts on the new blog Standing On Peace. If you haven't had a chance to check it out, be sure to go visit. There are some wonderful posts and a book give away each week this month to celebrate the launch.

You mean I'm not as bad as I think I am? Part One - Recognizing negative self-talk

As long as I can remember I have struggled with negative self-talk and condemnation. Never believing I was good enough. The simplest mistake would start the tape rolling. “I’m stupid, bad, a failure, I shouldn’t have ever tried.”
It only got worse once I became a mom. Fear of “doing it wrong” plagued my mind. Almost every time I lost my patience or the situation was difficult, I would hear “you never should have become a mom, what were you thinking?! You weren’t meant for this!”
By the Grace of God and being intentional with my thoughts my negative self-talk is a lot quieter. It still pops up from time to time but it no longer has control.
What is negative self-talk? It is self-blame. Self-condemnation. Self-limiting messages. Breaking this habit is possible, though it takes effort.
Some common negative thoughts:
  • I’m not good enough.
  • I’m ugly.
  • I’m too fat/tall/short/young/old.
  • I’m stupid.
  • I am not lovable.
  • I am a bad parent.
  • There is something wrong with me.
  • I never have enough time.
  • I don’t deserve …
  • I can’t …
  • I’m a failure.
  • I’m not worth it.
Negative self-talk can be automatic. Often we aren’t even aware our tape is playing.
Do you experience negative thoughts? The first step in changing negative self-talk is recognizing it.
The second step is discovering what triggers it. Over the next few days pay close attention to your thoughts. Is there a tape of negative self-talk that starts when you are upset, frustrated or something has gone wrong?

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