The theme for the weekend was laying down our burdens. Two women shared from very different places in life. One newly married, no children, one married 20+ years and five children. Yet both shared from their hearts. I approached the weekend with some reservations. I truly love a good weekend away and time with other women feed my soul. Yet I found myself a little cautious about the topic. Often it seems, we (I) go away, get fresh perspective and then fall-right-back-in-to-the-same-old-routine, quickly forgetting my new insights. Ever have that happen? I was concerned that I would be all motivated and then crash. So while there, I listened, took notes, and pondered what the speakers shared. It wasn't until Monday that I began to process.
Burdens are not always great, huge mountains to climb, burdens are often the daily grid. The dishes, the laundry, dance lessons, bedtimes, work, dinner.... These are the burdens that weigh me down. I strive to conquer them on my own believing that if I only had the right routine or the perfect check list or if only my children would follow the wonderful routine and checklist I have created, then all would be right in the world. WRONG! I am human and therefore inherently flawed! No matter how much might I muster I can not do this on my own. I've heard others say that we must invite Him, Christ, into our daily living allow Him to be our strength. My mind has known this for awhile but it wasn't until this past weekend that my heart discovered it.
We tend to take hold of our daily burdens, our daily living, as if it is our own. When in fact it is not. It is His. One of the speakers (the mamma with 5 children) shared how easy we trust our eternal existence to Christ but not our daily. In our daily we hold the false belief that we are in control and that we can do it. And sometimes we are even successful at it. Success just feeds the lie that we can do it on our own. I've noticed an ever so slight change in how I have approach my daily duties. I've tried to shift my focus back to Christ when I feel my blood pressure raising. I've been reminding myself that life is not an emergency but something to relish. With time moving so quickly, the reality of Kindergarten for Jilian and middle school for Grace (*GASP*) is helping me to remember, that all this is only here for a short time and with His grace, love, mercy and strength my daily burdens haven't felt so heavy. This is a process. I can guarantee that in a week I will have forgotten this and will need to remember AGAIN. I have to give myself the grace to do this and remember it is a process, that over time, will be a little easier.